…Or, I’ll Just Write a Bit About Idol

20 May

Wouldn't it be cool if this guy won American Idol?

Jeez, that last post I wrote on Glee is a bit humbug-y, huh?  Sorry about that, World.  I guess that Tuesday Night TV Night just went long, and I was le tired, and for whatever reason, the overly-analytical joy-killing side of me took over. I still agree with most of the points I made, but also I bet the show’s going to be awesome.  I mean, it featured an A Capalla version of the Austin Powers theme!

Anyway, I wanted to write a second about the American Idol final performances – basically, I thought that each singer won one round, and that the final song sucked to a degree heretofore unseen in the world.  Kris’ take on “Ain’t No Sunshine” was absolutely killer, and managed to somehow top Adam’s “Mad World,” which is no small feat.  I love “Sunshine,” too, such a cool song, and Kris really rocked it.  However, his acoustic jam on “What’s Going On” was weak sauce – way to smile your way through lines about war killing people, dude.  Plus, well… it just couldn’t compare to the rockingness of Lambert singing “Change is Gonna Come.”  It was just rad to see Adam perform that song for a lot of reasons, and his awesome gayness is only a part of it.  Actually, Jacob at TWoP has a great take:

Without Danny to push against, it’s like he’s singing for everybody, and not just half of everybody. Whatever Kris does, he could have sung exactly this same song and it wouldn’t mean anything much different; either way it’s like, “Today is a really nice day and I’m glad we survived.” You know That whole foot pain is not a fact of life, life is much better than that thing. I keep waiting for the bad shit to show up and it keeps not happening. Maybe that’s for tomorrow. Maybe Rihanna will come and somebody will yell something inappropriate, or something.

So, yeah – they both had one great performance (and really, Adam had two), and either guy could win and I’d be happy.  Kris will sell a ton of albums, and Adam, provided he gets the right stage director and producer, will sell out his world tour.  The episode didn’t knock my socks off, but I like each contestant so much that it was fun to watch them take the stage one more time.

But can we talk for one more second about Kara?  I said it last week, and I’m saying it again – it is time for her to go.  Not only did she once again go out of her way to make us all feel uncomfortable (So jabby!  So forced!), she also wrote what has to be the worst coronation song in the history of American Idol. (Actually, second-worst – Joe R. put up an awesome ranking of coronation songs in terms of awfulness, and Taylor Hicks’ song gets the bottom honor, which, yeah, that’s about right).

It managed to sit in a horrible register for both singers (Adam was belting right in his break, so he actually sounded like he was straining, and Kris was way above his comfortable register) and be about as wretchedly cliched and harmonically boring as a song could possibly be.  Does this just happen if you live in LA too long? Any semblance of creativity and non-hackiness just goes right out the window? The people who worked on this tune were supposed to be “good” songwriters, professionals…  I mean, I think she wrote it with three people, for fuck’s sake!  I don’t need to hear the next great Sufjan composition or anything, but they could’ve at least written a memorable chorus. Enough of you, Kara.  Ca Suffit. Go back to whatever it was you were doing before January.

Last thing – I know I just said that I’d be happy no matter the outcome, but still: Lambert for the win!!


Fly back over the mountains to the clouds of your dreams, Kara. Sheesh already.


2 Responses to “…Or, I’ll Just Write a Bit About Idol”

  1. thesoniashow May 20, 2009 at 8:53 am #

    Ugh! That song … No Boundaries? No thanks!

  2. DeeCee May 21, 2009 at 4:45 am #

    My husband and I also didn’t care for Kara’s song. However we both think Adam did the better job at delivering it. Kris is a nice guy but his voice is weak. Adam should have won. We don’t think we’ll ever watch Idol again, it was so disappointing. Obviously Idol needs to only allow 1 vote per person. Other polls manage to do that. The public doesn’t get that it’s a singing competition, not popularity or “cuteness”. Geesh!! Adam is our winner!

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